Before starting this jam post I quick double-checked the math and, yup, it’s been about fourteen months since my one and only “What I’ve Been Watching” post. Boy howdy, where’d the time go? I had planned to do these semi-regularly (like, every few months maybe?), but the first one took so long to write and compose that I just didn’t do it again. Because I’m lazy. But, it’s Halloween time and that’s as great a time as any to enthuse a little about what I’ve been watching lately—and, no surprise, I’ve mostly been watching horror.
Let’s get to it, shall we?
Salems Lot (1979) and Salems Lot (2024)
We recently watched the latest version of Stephen King’s classic novel ‘Salem’s Lot and, all in all, it was decent. Nice, moody, creepy atmosphere, good performances, for the most part, and some genuinely chilling moments. It captured the mid-seventies, small town setting pretty well, too. However—and this is a big however—the new HBO movie feels massively rushed. King’s novel is, in my opinion, one of the best novels of its era, one of the best horror novels of all time, and one of the best vampire novels ever written. I’m rereading it right now, in fact. It’s a perfect October read. It’s also an extraordinary piece of writing. We learn all about the residents of the Lot, the scares are truly disturbing, and the band of amateur vampire hunters attempting to free their town from a very bad vampire is incredibly moving.
The new movie just leaves out way too much while coming in under two hours. By contrast, the 1979 two-part TV movie from horror maestro Tobe Hooper is three hours long and even then it has to cut stuff from the novel. I went back and rewatched Hooper’s Lot after the new one and it’s as good as I’d remembered. The book is better than any of its adaptations, but the 1979 telefilm has become a horror classic for a reason: it’s damn good.
Also, and not for nothing, but the 2024 movie doesn’t have Julie Adams as the appropriately nicknamed “Boom Boom” Bonnie Sawyer like the 1979 movie does. Every time I watch it, I marvel at Adams’s inexplicably smoking hot presence. By most counts, it shouldn’t register a ten on the sexual charisma Richter scale, but it most definitely does. Her hairdo looks like a permed mushroom, she’s preternaturally perky, and the character is the town slut—okay, actually, that last one is a positive. Adams plays a slut really well—her voice is super sexy; she exquisitely fills out the tiniest, tightest shorts north of Hazzard County; and she seems like she’d be a total freak between the sheets.
Sorry, this got waaaay off topic. But hey, Boom Boom Bonnie has a way of sidetracking a man. I mean, you try and stay focused with this on your mind:
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…oh, sorry. I’m back. Had to catch my breath there for a minute. Anyway. If you’re going to try the ‘24 Lot, you best chase it with the ‘79 Lot so you can end things on a higher note. Both are entertaining, but ‘79 is exponentially better. Besides über babe Julie Adams, I have two more words to give you in ‘79’s favor: David Soul. Oh, and two more: James Mason. Also: Bonnie Bedilia. Okay, now I need to move on to the other movies in this list because I’ve already overwritten this, thanks to Julie Adams and her lively breasts, toned legs, and tight tush…see? And you wonder why these posts take so long to write.
Halloween 4: The Return of Michael Myers (1988)
One of my favorites in the Halloween franchise, Part 4 opens with quite possibly the most eerily evocative autumn establishing shots of any horror film. It’s gorgeous work, really haunting, and it sets the mood perfectly. This is the movie that brought back Slasher Mike and Dr. “I shot him six times!!” Loomis after Halloween III: Season of the Witch nearly killed the franchise (which is nuts because I love that movie and so do most horror fans I know). The entry also introduced little Jamie Lloyd, daughter of Michael’s sister, Laurie Strode. I genuinely love the first five Halloween movies, along with Halloween H2O: 20 Years Later, so I always need to watch at least some of them every October.
Speaking of H2O…
Halloween H2O: 20 Years Later (1998)
Absent from the franchise since 1981’s Halloween II, the return of Laurie Strode—and her portrayer, Jamie Lee Curtis—was a big damn deal. And it delivered, for this fan, at least. To this day, H20 is my definitive closure story for Laurie. Forget the abomination Halloween: Resurrection that followed, and forget the most recent reboots starring Curtis because they’re largely awful. This is my headcanon for how Laurie’s story ends. Perfection.
Ready or Not (2019)
I’ve watched Ready or Not at least once a year since it came out in 2019. It’s a modern classic, in my humble opinion, on par with all the great horror comedies of the eighties. Modern-day scream queen Samara Weaving is absolutely amazing in this (and everything else I’ve ever seen her do). If you hate obscenely wealthy people (and you really should), then this movie is for you. “Jesus Christ, what happened to you?” [pause] “In-laws.” Brilliant movie, one of the best.
The Ambulance (1990)
What if I told you there existed a movie where Eric Roberts sports an absolutely epic mullet, plays a comic book artist who draws for Marvel, and gets wrapped up in a strange and surreal mystery involving a lost woman he barely knows as he obsessively tries to find her. Yup, such a movie exists. How I never knew this until recent years blows my mind. It combines so many things I love—and loved really hard in 1990—Marvel Comics, New York City, Eric Roberts at his most charming, legendary cult movie director Larry Cohen, James Earl Jones as a crotchety police detective, Megan Gallagher as a super hot police officer, Stan Lee playing Stan Lee for the first time on film, and so much more. This one is seriously underrated and deserves its own Lost and Found entry, so I’ll say no more for now, except check it out if you can. It’s a lot of fun.
What Lies Beneath (2000)
It’s October, so that means it’s time once more to revisit one of my favorite autumn classics, the chilly, New England ghost story What Lies Beneath. Featuring a sensational and gripping performance from Michelle Pfeiffer, Harrison Ford playing against type, and beautiful autumnal atmosphere aplenty, it’s required viewing for me every October. I could go on about pfabulous Pfeiffer and this film, or you could click over to the link above or go here and here.
Offseason (2021)
This was a first time watch and I rather enjoyed it. Look, it stars Jocelin Donahue, who played the lead character Samantha in Ti West’s The House of the Devil (2009), which happens to be one of my favorite movies of all time. Because of that movie, I’ll follow Donahue anywhere, which is what led me to give this indie mystery/ghost story set on a remote island a shot. The spooky story allowed for plenty of tight shots showcasing Donahue’s confused or frightened reactions, and she’s gorgeous, so closeups of her are always a positive. It would make a good double feature with What Lies Beneath, actually. It could’ve been scarier, but it had an eerily off-kilter, Stephen-King-short-story-type vibe that made it a good autumn watch.
The Shining (1980) and Doctor Sleep (2019)
More Stephen King! I’ve watched Stanley Kubrick’s chilling masterpiece The Shining so many times since high school I’ve lost count. It’s one of my favorite movies. I’ve now watched Doctor Sleep three or four times since it came out and I still feel like I did after the first viewing: it’s a worthy sequel/follow-up to both Kubrick’s movie and to King’s source novel. It’s ridiculously rewatchable too. The Torrance family fascinates me, and son Danny’s journey from The Shining through the end of Doctor Sleep is incredibly satisfying.
There were more movies this month, but I’m tired and this post went on for long enough (thanks, Julie Adams).
The Starfire Lounge 
Bonnie is bodacious. She certainly brightened up a gloomy Monday.
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